WHAT HAVE THE NORMANS EVER DONE FOR US?

– A TRIBUTE –

Reg: “But I ask you what have the Normans ever done for us?”

Stan: “Castles.”

Reg: “Oh yeah, yeah they gave us that. That’s true.”

Trevor: “And cavalry!”

Gerald: “Oh yes… the mounted soldier!”

Eddie: “Yeah, you remember how we used to have fight everything on foot!”

Reg: “All right, I’ll grant you that the castles and the cavalry are two things that the Normans have done…”

Ronald: “They brought Latin…”

Reg: “Well yes, obviously Latin… the Latin goes without saying. But apart from the castles, the cavalry and Latin…”

Burt: “Stone-built cathedrals…”

Reg: “As I was saying, what…”

Other voices: “Chivalry… Surnames… Domesday Book…”

Reg: “Yes… all right, fair enough…”

Francis: “And the wine…”

Dennis: “Oh yes! True! That’s something we’d really miss if the Normans left, Reg.”

Jerry: “End of slavery… let’s face it, they’re the only ones who could have changed that around here.” (more general murmurs of agreement)

Reg: “All right… all right… but apart from castles and cavalry and chivalry and wine and better cathedrals and surnames and Latin and Domesday Book and the end of serfdom… what have the Normans done for us?

Stan: “Brought peace.”

Reg: “What!? Peace? Oh, shut up!”